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i'm giving myself ten minutes to grow up,
and with every minute that passes i am remembering
balloons and party hats and streamers
and the second star to the right,
straight on 'til morning.

every year i write myself a poem for my birthday,
but this year i think i'll write a poem about
peter pan and he'll die in the end and everyone
will be sad. i'll be the saddest though,
because there comes a point in your life
when you realize that you're not peter pan,
or wendy, or even a lost boy.

(how sad, i think, to be lost but not a lost boy.
it doesn't matter though, because neverland isn't
real and now look, i'm another year older, and what
have i even done with my life?)

today i'm twenty-three and peter pan is dead.
my ten minutes have passed and i still haven't
grown up. people around me forget how to talk
to mermaids, and no one claps because no one
believes in fairies, or flying, or themselves.

today every birthday candle looks like a bone
and i still have so many wishes left to make.
maybe i should know who i am and what i am
doing by now, but i don't know. i don't care.
i'm twenty-three and this is all i have, it's all i
will ever have. you can keep your careers and cars
and aspirations. i will be waiting by my window
for a little boy with stars for eyes who can
never grow older because he is dead.
say hi to steve irwin for me, pan.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconderpyandme:
DerpyandMe Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2015  Hobbyist Artist
Wow, that's awesome.
Reply
:iconjackiestarsister:
JackieStarSister Featured By Owner May 15, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
This is very relatable, nicely done!
Reply
:iconianabelleisak:
IanabelleIsaK Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2014
Great work!
Reply
:iconanazuzu:
Anazuzu Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2014
Absolutely moving...i'm 20 and I'm about to get married..and I don't know if  I really want to leave behind leaving home yet. I've been in school in all my life, and had so many tears shed over useless papers and grades on pieces of cardboard for a dream...funny how we let grades and teachers break our immortal spirits...

Paper can burn, but so can hearts.

But the outcomes are ashes and ambitions.
Reply
:icondoublethefun:
doublethefun Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2013
I just want you to know that I love this poem so much I come back ad reread it from time to time :)
Reply
:icontheemptychest:
TheEmptyChest Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013
How is it that I have just now discovered you? You are made of awesome. And your writing... it's unreal. My utmost respect to you, ma'am. <3
Reply
:iconestallidos:
estallidos Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2013  Professional Writer
well thank you! that is rather kind :)
Reply
:icontheemptychest:
TheEmptyChest Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2013
You're more than welcome.
Reply
:iconilovechez:
ilovechez Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
But to die would be an awfully big adventure
Reply
:iconiamjklmnop:
iamjklmnop Featured By Owner Jun 15, 2015
To move on from this life and on to anew, that is quite the adventure
Reply
:iconpaperbackrevelations:
PaperbackRevelations Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow.. Every single part of this is breathtaking!
Reply
:icondribeltneg:
driBeltneG Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
just wow. really good. it makes me sad, but i love it so much.
Reply
:iconshidifenni:
shidifenni Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2013   Photographer
speechless
Reply
:iconestallidos:
estallidos Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2013  Professional Writer
<3
Reply
:iconquauhtli123:
quauhtli123 Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
wow
Reply
:iconancientfire33:
ancientfire33 Featured By Owner Dec 21, 2012  Student Writer
To never ever grow-up! But I believe he will still be their with you, for once a lost boy always a lost boy, just keep that faith and if you believe in faeries...oh well suckz for the other people!

Peter Pan will always be their to look after his lost boys, even if they grow old with wrinkles the magic stays forever!

And awesome poem, your writing is simply breath-taking! :)
Reply
:icontigress1314:
Tigress1314 Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This explains me so much. Its how i feel exactly, which also makes me sad, because its true. :/
Reply
:iconcharcoalgreetings:
Charcoalgreetings Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2012  Student General Artist
Stop it. you're making my cry. this is beautiful. and it's good to know that someone can still sit by their window at 23 and wait for him. :'(
Reply
:icondoublethefun:
doublethefun Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2012
I just want you to know I read this a long time ago and remembered it and searched for it to read again today because I liked it so much.
Reply
:iconttttahlie:
ttttahlie Featured By Owner Nov 15, 2012
Your writing is simply breath taking
Reply
:icondreamslive:
DreamsLive Featured By Owner Oct 20, 2012  Student Writer
I DO BELIEVE IN FAERIES! I DO! I DO! I don't think anyone ever really knows who they are, and even when they get a sense of knowing, who you are changes. I'm not the same person I was four years ago, last year, or even yesterday. ^^ just saying. I like it. Especially the incorporation of peter pan and childhood dreams that never go away.
Reply
:iconmirroredsadness:
MirroredSadness Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is such an emotional poem! It says so much that I never realised that I felt. It's beautiful. I love it!
Reply
:iconlinney69:
Linney69 Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Peter Pan R.I.P by Kula Shaker. It's one of my favourite songs.
Reply
:iconestallidos:
estallidos Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2012  Professional Writer
just looked this up on youtube. holy shit. griefchills.

thank you for posting this. lovely song, only downside is i now feel unoriginal, haha.
Reply
:iconlinney69:
Linney69 Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
hahaha its very difficult to find originality in whole nowadays, because so many emotions and situations have already been touched upon through the many forms of art we have!

the most you can aim for is to touch people in your own way, through your own emotions and your own mind. you affected me just as much with that poem even though i already knew that song :D glad you enjoyed the song. :)
Reply
:iconforestmeetwildfire:
forestmeetwildfire Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
this: how sad, i think, to be lost but not a lost boy.
and this: i will be waiting by my window
for a little boy with stars for eyes who can
never grow older because he is dead.

are so wonderful and i love the idea of peter pan being dead - makes me think of immortals and such. this is such a beautiful piece, so full of emotion and it just feels very real. (:
Reply
:iconginiaworrell:
GiniaWorrell Featured By Owner Sep 19, 2012
beautiful!!!!!
Reply
:iconmoonlitwarrior95:
moonlitwarrior95 Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
aaaahhhhh your writing kills me a little inside everytime. It must torture you :( But yet, i love it so much. God you beautiful human being, you!
Reply
:iconxpheonix57:
xpheonix57 Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2012
^ This is exactly how I feel as well, said more poignantly.
Reply
:icontiajones:
tiajones Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
this is absolutely wonderful. <3
Reply
:icongoddessxofxlust:
goddessXofXlust Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2012
My birthday was three days ago, and this really was moving.
Reply
:icontronde:
Tronde Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2012
"today i'm twenty-three and peter pan is dead" </3
Reply
:iconrazumihin:
Razumihin Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
excellent. i love the subversion of peter pan throughout, and especially the final line--it hits hard.
Reply
:iconblue-starr:
Blue-Starr Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
The imagery and the emotions you put into this are beautiful. I'm eighteen and attending my first year of college...but I still can't make myself feel like an adult. It just doesn't feel real yet. Perhaps it's because I'm in school still, and perhaps it's because I still rely on my family for just about everything...but to me, childhood never dies. I believe a person can remain young spiritually even if their body grows old. You are never too old to smile, laugh, sing, dream, dance, believe, question, or imagine. Life is what you make of it, and I plan to make mine a dream come true, just as I planned several years ago. :heart:
Reply
:icontori-33:
Tori-33 Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Reply
:iconsalright:
sAlright Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012   Traditional Artist
I don't think you'll ever lose that beautiful childlike essence.. (: as long as you hold onto it.
And you've written a book (which I've bought). I think that's really accomplishing something :hug:
Reply
:iconninjapixiex3:
NinjAPixiEX3 Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Omg...This is really sweet, but sad.
Reply
:iconbolkvadzemerab:
bolkvadzemerab Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012
sadness LVL: overload
Reply
:iconkirikouyuki:
KirikouYuki Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
It's an amazing piece of work, in fact, it's possibly one of the most moving pieces I've ever had the pleasure of reading on DA.
Perhaps it's because it strikes a chord.

Growing up and suddenly having to be mature and having it expected of you is quite frankly terrifying and flat-out stifling. Suddenly your life is about expectations and ambition, or at least that's what people keep telling you it should be about. If you ask me it's more important to hold onto your childhood. I don't see how letting go of that part of yourself makes you happy :/
Reply
:icon109-0415:
109-0415 Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012   Writer
I meant to be twenty-three and doing nothing, but I couldn't when there are teenagers dying on the streets every day.

And now people are transforming me into a hero and it's terrifying me and I wish I was waiting by a window instead of writing budgets and strategic plans.
Reply
:icon109-0415:
109-0415 Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012   Writer
It's so much easier, yunno, to be staring out a window than to have homeless teenagers count on you to make sure there are volunteers there every week. Sometimes I wish, and sometimes I get drunk.
Reply
:icon109-0415:
109-0415 Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012   Writer
And sometimes those volunteers pocket dial me at 2 a.m.
Reply
:iconthelearningartist:
TheLearningArtist Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I love this. The last line is my favorite.
Reply
:iconmissjaggededges:
missjaggededges Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012
this is truly breathtaking, my heart dropped. thankyou.
Reply
:iconsabamaki:
SabaMaki Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012
your poem is wonderful. it contains more reality than reality itself. <3
Reply
:iconitisjusti:
ItisjustI Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012
I'm 29... I sure feel this. Who is Steve Irwin?
Reply
:iconsully-bean:
Sully-Bean Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012
you're so wonderful
Reply
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